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For the Love of Yourself
As Lucille Ball had once said: "Love yourself first and all else falls into line." Not sure if I believe her, but I sure would like too, heck, who wouldn't? I am sure if u love yourself, u will feel positive, caring what others think of u would effect u less. :) It's not easy getting to that level of self-love for sure, lol. But, with changing of old negative habits it's very possible. So I and a few others I know are going on a journey of self-acceptance and self-improvement. This is for our health (mainly sanity), and I hope u hop on for the ride. :)
What does high-quality mean? Well, according to Merriam-Webster Dictionary, quality means: how good or bad something is. : a characteristic or feature that someone or something has : something that can be noticed as a part of a person or thing. : a high level of value or excellence. Hmm...do we treat ourselves as high-quality beings? I think most of us would like to, but don't. If we want to live a high-quality life, which most if not all, do, then we need to start treating ourselves as high-quality beings, js. :)
How to accomplish treating urself as a high-quality person:
1.) Be confident in ur own flesh, be who u are without worrying about the judgments of others, u can only be u. If u are holding back any part of urself for another, u are not living a high-quality life. As in...if u are having a good time with friends, laughing, smiling, joking, and ur mate enters the room, giving u dirty looks, being upset, so u stop laughing, and joking...that right there is changing urself for another. U are NOT responsible for anothers feelings, do not own it, and be who u are. If, say, ur mate later lashes out at u, u have a deeper issue and need to seek talking with ur mate and/or counseling and delve deeper into ur issues, js.
2.) Do things to help with ur positive self-esteem. Hang with like minded and supportive people. Write affirmations to urself and post them around ur home (bathroom mirror, work lunch bag, post it note on ur computer, etc. Get creative.) Ask ur caring and loving friends to snap their fingers when they hear u putting urself down. Meditate on ur positives and don't allow urself to think on negative thoughts. We are our own worst critics.
3.) Be as nice as u can be to others and eventually this will become habit and will draw positive people to ur more positive attitude to others, which will rub off on urself and u will become more positive toward urself, hence raising the quality in ur life. :)
4.) If u believe ur looks have something to do with a high-quality life, ur sadly mistaken. Sure, we all want to be models, worshiped for our beauty, have people want to recognize us for our looks, but that's all superficial and will disappear with age as is life. The only thing I can say here is: U are u, u are beautiful in the way the Goddess and God made u, they gave u imperfections for a reason, so others can see the beauty in that imperfection. If ur over weight and want to change that, then try, but remember not all over weight people are unhealthy, some is just genetic makeup in ur linage. If ur don't like ur wrinkles...do facial massages every morning and every night. There are great Youtube videos on how to do this. Same with if u believe u have cellulite. Massage is a wonderful health tool and high-quality life aid.
5.) Learn to value urself and not to rely on others to affirm ur worth. The only worth that matters comes from within. Others can make u feel worthy only for a short period of time. Yes its great getting affirmation that the things u do and like are accepted by others and enjoyed, but their acceptance does NOT make u a worthy person. U being u and enjoying what u do, no matter the outside masses, is what makes u a worthy person, and once u have that knowledge, noone can take it from u. U need to constantly tell urself u are worthy of love, peace, joy, happiness, and then u need to have the courage to walk away from what make u feel is unworthy, or to change it if it can be. U need to value who u are, this will lead u to a high-quality life within.
6.) Take ur negativity and turn it into positivity. Many negative things can happen in our lifetimes, most we internalize, belittling ourselves, telling ourselves it was our fault, or so and so's fault, and that may well be true....so? U need to forgive urself and not internalize all the trash. The baggage gets heavy my friend, believe me, I know. Learn to let go of things, u cannot change what is left behind, but step up and change from the spot ur in. Wrongs were done, a lesson learned, now let go and take this very moment to say."I can go on, I can improve, I learned what I needed to, and I have survived to move to the positive." Is this easy, hell no, lol. It's a daily practice, a constant pep talk to urself, a constant awareness of what u say and do, of how u act. But as time goes on, u become more aware of ur needs, ur wants for a higher-quality life, and u will start demanding things change and u will start to change them.
Will all of this remove all of ur self doubt? No. Will u never have a problem arise? U will have many. Will u have a perfect life? That's a life long goal. But, with these tips and tricks and lessons and knowledge, u can have a high-quality life as it is known to u, everyones experiences are different, only u can raise the quality in ur views, ur mind and ur life. :)
Be gentle with urself, and if feeling vulnerable, it is very very much okay to step away and take a breather. Step from people, the computer, the television, etc. Meditate and relax and think on ur needs, when ur strength has returned anew, no matter how long it takes, then u can return IF u wish too, there is nothing written in stone that says if something isn't working for u, u learn from it and then place it in ur past. I want u to think of all the things u feel u have done right/positive in the last year. Think of things that were supporting and sustaining. Focus ur attention on the things that worked. Now, in ur notebook/journal, write down 25 things that u are most proud of accomplishing in the past year. When finished, I want u to ook over what u wrote and celebrate all u have accomplished. Celebrate these successes in ur life. Celebrate what it took to achieve these things. Realize that, seeing the good in others starts with SEEING THE GOOD WITHIN URSELF.
Now list 3 ways u have grown over the past year. Then do an hour long meditation on these positive things. Think on what u went through, what it took to attain these things. Who helped u get there? What strengths did u use? Then picture urself achieving more of ur goals and accomplishing all that u need to from here on out. Shake away any negative thoughts and tell them a loud "NO", when they try to enter ur mind. And try they will. Realize the negative is a distorted view of urself, positivity is an action view, js. :) When u feel happy, relaxed, calm, u can step away from ur meditation with a lighter heart.
Be ok with who u are, with what ur doing and in where u are headed. That is ur truth, ur higher-quality self. The truth is...u already have in u everything u need to have a higher-quality life, u just need to unplug the blockage and see it for what it is. :) Forgiving others doesn't make them right...nor wrong, but it frees up negative space in our minds and emotions to make room for more positive works in the future. U have to free things up to make opportunities to repeat and re-create the positives in ur life. The Goddess and God do NOT punish u...u punish urself with guilt, shame, fear and by making the choice to not act in togetherness with ur divine nature (working against whats natural). If u step back and see the larger picture of ur life and the divine, u will see that there is a divine order to everything in life. What u see will be different than what others see because their divine order is separate, yet connected, and different than ur divine order. Where u are in ur life is exactly where u are suppose to be, and yeah, that can be a bitch. A lot of times all we see is the negative, and just blink past a positive. Life is the unfolding of experiences designed to open ur mind and bring awareness of natural laws. What are natural laws? It is a body of unchanging moral principles regarded as a basis for all human conduct and an observable law relating to natural phenomena. In this natural law, the divine has shown u grace in the abundance u have received. Look deep, u will find it. :) And in peace, joy, well-being and love. And, yes, a lot of times it's hard to see these things when ur life seems to be in turmoil and possibly depression. But step back and look at how u receive all this in how u think, how u feel and what u believe about ur life, urself and the divine. Learn to live what u believe everyday, this in turn makes ur life and self full of quality! Remind urself on a daily basis that u are perfect and unique. U are a representative of all the Goddess and God are. Rejoice in who u are! The Goddess and God believe in u, in who u are, in what u are trying to accomplish with their help. :) Be open to knowing the truth about urself so u can remove baggage that no longer serves u. Be open in learning and knowing about ur depression, anger, fear and self-doubt. Be open to know the truth about some "friendships". Be open to seeing ur negativity so it can be changed. Accept ur truths, see them as they are, become aware and banish what holds u back, seek support and help, learn all u can, and talk to the divine in meditation on everything. :)
I want to thank all who read this Blog post and hope u accept who u are, rid urself of unwanted baggage that is old and stale and reach for the higher-quality of u and ur life in the arms of the Goddess and God. Blessed be my smexy witches! -Elder Brimstone-